Tuesday, October 26, 2010

MICHELLE"S SPEECH TO SEX WORKERS IN INDIA

Barack and his squeeze just cannot help it.  Being on the George Soros "Open Society Institute" payroll makes them do some seriously crazy things.  The latest is Michelle's planned téte á téte with "commercial sex workers" on their trip to India. 

"Adding to the Obamas’ busy schedule is Michelle’s likely visit to Kamathipura, where she will meet commercial sex workers on the invitation of an NGO. The highprofile visit is likely to inconvenience the citizens, as there could be a complete clampdown on traffic on some main roads of south Mumbai and sanitisation of buildings flanking them." News Here

So here is my suggestion for Michelle's speech. She is free to use this, in fact I encourage her to plagerize me all she wants!

"Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedules today to meet with me.  I know it took you a lot of extra time today to dress appropriately for our intimate yet professional meeting. Your work is so important to the society of India that everyone has made a really big sacrifice to accommodate my conference with you.  I know there are customers standing by just outside who cannot wait to purchase your services now that you have come close to the First Lady of the United States.  You know, I have that Hot Momma kind of star quality that makes people think about sex the first time they see me.  And I do bare my arms at every single personal appearance so they can see at least some part of my naked body.

Now you might not realize it, but there is only one place in the United States where your type of work is legal.  Reno, Nevada.  The rest of the United States is either stuck in the age of the Victorians or is hiding in the closet with pornographic magazines.   We intend to fix that.  My visit with you will definitely legitimize prostitution for all of Americans and from now on you will be known as leaders in the new millennium sexual revolution in the West.  After all, Americans are paying out the wazoo for all of the consequences of promiscuous sex.  Money for aids, STDs and abortions is pouring forth from our ignorant tax payers who don't participate in random sexual encounters, but have to pay for them anyway through medical expenses and research.  So. you see, it is only a matter of time until they realize that as long as they are going to pay for it anyway, they might as well participate in all of the fun.

In America we have tanning salons and nail salons in every strip shopping center in every town.  Because of your inspiration, I know the next hot wave for commercial activity in all of our towns across America is commercial sex operations!!  And think what that will do for the commercial real estate industry that has slumped due to Barack's anti-business and industry policies.  And also, think of all of the commercial sex workers who can join the Chamber of Commerce!  Wow!  That should liven that group up quite a bit....those stodgy old farts!  The Chamber meetings will never be dull, that's for sure!  Instead of Chamber women being entertained with professional fashion shows,  we can have the commercial sex workers show up for the luncheons and pass around sex toys as favors!  How fun will that be!  (sex toys made in China will be all the rage! People will have lead exposure they never dreamed of!  And that will keep Kathleen Sebelius very busy implementing treatments through Barack's new health care program.  She'll be so excited!)

Speaking of commercial opportunities, I am salivating at the tax coffers filling up with, "Ka-ching," lots of money from the taxes we will charge for every hot, steamy, sexual encounter in the United States.  And just think of the wads and wads of green produced by the laundries who will be washing the sheets!  This is so scrumptious, I can hardly contain my libido!

After I finish speaking, I'd love it if you would all come to me, one on one, so you can tell me all about your successful techniques.  I'm sure Barack will be forever grateful and he will funnel even more money to you through George's Open Society Institute and the U.N.  We have primed the pump for just this sort of commercial enterprise in America for many years.  While Barack and I have Czars to enforce every conceivable abomination onto the American public, now is the best time for me to take your success stories back to the States and get those stupid Americans even more distracted.  As long as they are banging away on sex workers, they won't be banging away on their computer keyboards complaining about Barack's Socialist dogma!  You see what a great thing you are doing for the world?  I can't thank you enough.

Well, that is all the time I will take from your very important vocation in life.  Time is money in your line of work.  Your customers are waiting and, frankly, I can't wait one more minute for all of the tips I know you will give me!
Thanks, and I hope I can come again!"

P.S. from the writer...
I really am too ladylike to have said any of this in polite company.  But I'm hiding behind my keyboard and pretending my mother is smacking me in the head for being so brash.  So excuse me if I offended anyone. 

2 comments:

  1. Cheryl...OMG you are soo crazy! hahahaha

    ReplyDelete
  2. Carl...I'm so glad I made you laugh!!

    ReplyDelete